거짓말

now that this is settled, i really hope everything will be alright, things will go as planned smoothly, and that our dream will come true.

i really really wanna have faith in this but why do i keep getting the feeling that something is not right? you know, what they call 不祥的预感。

suspicion is contagious.

i've always believed in the fact theory that if i didn't take something that is not mine, something that is mine wouldn't be taken away. ie, i believe in karma. that's why i'll never pick it up even see if i see money on the floor. i remembered once (i wonder if i have mentioned this in my blog before) when liangying and i were walking along the circumference of hai sing, we saw a ten-dollar note on the floor (and just coincidentally we were talking about something which costs $10) and we were like o.o and guess what we did?

we picked it up.

and brought it back to school! hahahahahaas! :D

and then there was another time when we saw money on the floor again. (can't rmb if it was a ten-dollar note or a fifty-dollar note) i asked her if she wants it and she said no, vice versa. so we started walking away from it. then there was this malay aunty behind us and asked us,

"yall don't want?"

we shook our heads.

"then i take arh?"

we said okay awkwardly and walked off.

have told a few of my friends aboout this and they think i'm silly. because after all, that money isn't considered as somebody's property already. it's free to be anyone's property, they argued. true. but what if the person comes back to find the money that he dropped? it could have been his property again if it wasn't found by someone else first.

i just find that 'finder's keeper, loser weepers' is morally not right.

cos i know if i take the money i'll be pricked by conscience. oh and that said, i don't like the idea of earning money through the system of 'buying-and-selling stocks'. it just seems to me like getting a wealth of fortune without putting in any effort in though i know this isn't really true cos some people really go to great lengths to study the tactics and tricks of the stock market. plus you need to invest some amount of money to expect returns. and my belief also applies in things such as 4D, ToTo, soccer/ horse betting etc etc. gambling as a leisure or as a superstition, eg buying the number of the wedding car's plate on the belief that the number will win, is okay. but if one depends on such ways to earn a living, i really don't think he will get very far. admittedly, i gamble too ie by playing cards on occasions such as chinese new year but only cos i view it as a source of fun, not as an opportunity to multiply my 'capital'. in short, it depends on how people look at things but that's how i see it heh.

anyway, i've digressed too much. back to the topic at hand. a world without lies. too idealistic?

if even i myself can't refrain from being a liar, how else can i expect a million, no, a billion others not to? but my lies are never used to hurt people or put others' welfare at a disadvantage. they usually take place in the form of self-defense or are innocent white lies. yet, is this perhaps another self-defense?

no it's not, i'm telling the truth and of course, it is up to you to decide whether you want to believe me or not. (:

i remembered reading an article saying that a test was conducted and 60% of those tested were found to be lying subconciously or unknowingly, since the results that were revealed to them later gave them a surprise.

and i just realised the format of this post is turning out to be like an essay, what with the thesis-anti-thesis format hahahas!

do you see the above as a lie? or as the truth? (:

p/s: i really really really hope that our welfares have not been put in a disadvantaged position. =/

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